Weight loss and triumph

It's been entirely too long between updates but there was a reason for it...well, not actually, but there is. More like an excuse. First off, it's hard to find motivation when you don't have many people supporting you...I felt like I was writing to myself, which in a way, COULD be motivating, but if I'm putting myself out there, I WANT people to respond. Secondly, I failed to realize that the ONLY way of motivating myself was to MOTIVATE MYSELF. It was wrong for me to assume that I needed someone to motivate me. I need support from people...to correct me when I'm out of line, to get me out there when I don't want to, but motivation, I've found, comes from within. Sometimes, it takes some sort of God smack to get yourself going, sometimes it's just the fear of failure or strive for success. For me, it was the God smack. So you see, I let myself balloon back to 205 pounds, from my lowest of 159. I just didn't care. I wasn't happy at home, my kids hate me and I used food to solve all my ills. Then my Dad passed away on Valentine's day and food again, I felt, was the ONLY thing there for me. So, I packed on 20+ pounds and got to my second highest weight ever (without being pregnant).

Go me.

Well, I was experiencing some odd stuff so I went to the doctor and had her run a few tests. Luckily, she went with her gut and ordered a series of tests that she didn't tell me about, but appeased me and did a few that I requested. Well, she was right (gee, is that what they go to med school for?!?) and I was indeed, pre-diabetic. See, when you get tested, your comprehensive metabolic panel can't be over 99 mg, your CHOL/HDLC ratio can not be over 5.0 and your triglycerides can't be over 150mg. Well, my results weren't so great. Comprehensive was at 103, CHOL was at 4.8 and triglycerides were off the chart at 256. Unreal. Watching my Dad suffer though diabetes and seeing how he just didn't care about what he ate, gained a lot of weight in his stomach and just kept pumping himself with insulin was NOT my idea of the legacy I wanted to leave for my kids. I wanted them to see that this was not a good diagnosis, but I was going to change my life and set the example for them.

And so it began...

I started my odyssey. Not my diet, not my exercise regimen, but my freedom from the possibilities of diabetes, a way of living my life truthfully and without using food as a crutch. I'm happy to report that I am now 160 pounds, 45 pounds down from where I started and 5 sizes down. My blood results were amazing...in only 4 months, I was able to lose the weight...and my numbers were that of an entirely different person. Comprehensive was 95, CHOL 3.7 and triglycerides...yeah, got those down to 117. Not to mention, my total cholesterol went from 197 to 159, HDL from 41 to 43 and LDL from 105 to 93. I changed my entire life, probably added a few years back on and am SO HAPPY with myself.

But I'm not just happy because I'm thinner. I still have 15 pounds to hit my goal of 145 and after I hit that goal, I want to hit 135 as my life goal...the weight that I always want to be. But I'm taking it easy this time...I'm not putting too much pressure on myself. Instead, I up my ante and I jog more miles, work harder and eat less when I'm stressed. I just can't get to that bad place again...for me and for my kids.

Lastly, everyone asks..."what's your secret?!". I hear this from skinny girls, medium girls and big girls...and to be honest, I went old school; DIET AND EXERCISE. And what I mean by diet is that I just watched what I ate...tried to be healthier with my choices, cut out fast food and made wise choices, not to mention, ate less of it....stopped when I was comfortable instead of full. I exercised every day, twice a day...started walking 2 miles in the morning and 2 miles at night. Now, I jog 2 miles on Tuesday and Thursday, jog/walk 4 miles on M, W, F and jog/walk 3 miles on Sat & Sun. I work out at night roughly 2-3 nights per week. Sure, the weight is slower at coming off now, but most of the time I'm going down instead of up and I'm not giving myself any excuses this time.

Hopefully, I'll be able to update more...it's always neat to look back on how far I've come. I want to post about cussing out Jillian Michaels when she's making me huff and puff. But mostly I want to post for me because I want to see how far I can get, how far I can push myself and how much of a better person I can be.

Onward fat girl!

Ok, so I haven't been totally perfect in my quest for weight loss. I have, however, been diligent at making a mockery of myself. LOL That said, it's time to change things up and move forward. My Mother-In-Law was in town this past weekend which only meant that we would be eating out more. I really tried to eat well. I even tried my first grilled Mahi-Mahi sandwich in a vain attempt to shy away from a hamburger and ate half my served portion of fries. I did indulge on pizza. But I ate light for the rest of the weekend, even made sure not to finish my dinner at the Rainforest Cafe...I ate half of my grilled chicken sandwich, nibbled on my hubby's yellow pepper/cucumber/raisin slaw and skipped most of my fries. That's a huge change for me.

I took my first step with cooking healthy today and surprisingly, had good results. We had natural chicken sausage with pasta in a broth sauce with broccoli. Added some reduced fat crescent rolls to make the family not completely shy away from dinner. My son was hesitant, but eventually caved and said that he liked it. Hubby had 2 servings and I had 2 myself (they were small servings). I did okay...it felt good to eat light and still feel satisfied...that's always been a challenge.

I'm down from what I was last week, almost a pound. Went to the gym and had a good arm/back/chest cardio work out. I'm ready to go for my walk now!

So....part deux

I have been trying to do well. I did, however, gain the weight that I had lost from the food poisoning. It took me over a month to do that, but I did. I was very disappointed in myself and upon gaining that weight back, I decided that it was time to really get serious.

I have lost 2 pounds in a week upon my "new conviction" and have been quite worried about gaining more weight. I really want this to be it, I really want to do well this time.

I have been watching my portions and exercising twice a day...my morning gym work out and a 2 mile brisk walk (35-40 minutes) each night. I feel much better doing that and I am starting to see my body changing more than with just the gym work outs. I see that my muscles are getting a lot of definition and once I lose all this flab, I really get to see how nice they look. I know that I look leaner, but the scale isn't showing it...my pants are starting to fit much better in the waist though, so that's a good sign.

I don't plan on updating this blog daily anymore since I get no support. I do want to check in though to keep myself in line and see my own progress.

Work Out Day-Cardio/Arms/Chest/Back

Don't have time to post tonight, very tired and the bed is shouting for me. I am so sore from yesterday's workout. Oy Vey.

Work Out:
25 minutes Elliptical; level 3; avg. rpm 73; total machine tally calories burned: 310
Pectoral Fly: 2 x 20; 40 lb
Back Extension: 3 x 20; 70 lb
Row/Rear Delt: 2 x 20; 40 lb
Vertical Press: 2 x 20; 45 lb
Arm Extension (triceps): 2 x 20 @ 30 lb
Arm Curl (bicep): 2 x 20; 20 lb
Tricep Press: 2 x 20; 70 lb
40 hanging stomach crunches

What the scale said today: 170.8 freaking pms and cake. LOL

Work Out Day-Cardio/Legs

I know it's been a while, but sickness has been back and forth between me and my daughter for the past 2 weeks. When she finally got well, I got sick and once I got well, she got really, REALLY sick and then I had to stay home with her. She's finally "ok" and I ventured out to the gym...it's been almost a month, I can hardly believe it. I'm really disappointed in myself, despite being completely unable to go...even if I could...with hubby working so much and being sick myself, it just wasn't possible. Now I'm back on track. I would love to glow about how great I did today, but I'm going off 5 hours of sleep, PMS and being a little rusty so that was hardly the case.

*long sigh*

Work Out:
20 minutes elliptical; level 3; average speed: 70; machine tally calories burned: 230
Seated Leg Press: 3 x 20; 70lb
Standing Calf: 2 x 15; 40lb
Hip Adduction (inner): 100 reps @ 50lb
Hip Abduction (outer): 100 reps @ 40lb
Prone Leg Curl: 2 x 20 30lb
Seated Leg Curl: 2 x 20 40lb
Leg Extension: 2 x 20 @ 20lb
50 Hanging Stomach crunches

*Extra*
1 mile fast paced walk

Diet:
Breakfast: 1 lowfat yoplait yogurt
Water: 3 .5 Liter bottles
Lunch: small bagel sandwich w/turkey and ham slices, 8 pringles
Snack: 10 peanut butter M&M's
Water: 1 110z glass
Dinner: 3 slices of Pizza Hut Pizza
Water: 2 11oz glasses
Dessert: 2 medium slices to yellow cake w/chocolate frosting


What the scale said today: 168.6

Sick Days...

Now, I finally recover and I'm ready and eager to get back to the gym.....

and then my daughter comes down with a nasty nose cold that results in her getting pink eye so that idea gets throw out the window. It's been fun spending time running around town to her doctor appointments and picking up drugs and dealing with a very whiny 3 year old that is sickly.

So, no gym...

BUT I've kept my weight down after my food poisoning! YAY!

What the scale said today: 169.4

Sick Days-Woe Is Me!

I have been struck with food poisoning...since the 28th. I am thrashed. At least I lost almost 4 pounds. I am fearful to eat that much as what little food I do ingest seems to find its way out of me rather quickly.

What the scale said today: 169.6